My one regret in life is that I am not Carps
Woody Allen is to make a film about the life and times of the mysterious Mr Carps. Shot as a pseudo-documentary, the film will contain interviews and narration from people who knew Carps. It will be shot entirely in black and white and will feature moving pictures. Rumours abound that Michael Caine is to play Carps. Woody Allen gave us his insight into the man that is Carps.Woody Allen, “I actually met Carps at Radio City in 1962. We were both hanging out in the female dressing room looking to get laid. Carps had his cock out and was chasing the dancers from Boobsville Cabaret around the room. He was like a magnificent beast from ancient mythology, all gold and horny. I heard he was a great lover, and that he often involved dwarves in his love making sessions. He was very popular before color television. Carps’ life story is an unusual one and my film will trace the impact his body had on society, particularly the lady part of society. It may be my shortest film to date.”
Our monkey researchers have been hired by Mr Allen as advisors to the film.
Categories: Carps
posted by Winston Q Niles at 01:14
9 Comments:
As an avid carps follower i can maybe give some knowledge to carps effect on the female population. He seeps love and lust with every step, women go weak at the knees and hearts skip a beat, he is by far the most awesome being to walk the earth, although the time i knew him was brief it will always be the most memorable time of my life and i can not thank the lord enough that i was able to be blessed with this event, if you ever get the opportuniy to meet the elusive character thank your lucky stars and let him use and loose you forever.
16:42
Forgot the t from opportunity and i mean lose you forever, my thoughts of the mighty carps's mighty one distracted me xxx
16:46
i know wot u mean,he slipped me the crippler a couple of times an' all.
18:27
Carps is a way of life......x
07:38
I'm not sure about carps meeting woody allen in 1962,I'm not sure about any of this...
07:43
Dear Jeremy, you probably had your head so far up your ass you missed 1962. God bless and a Happy Christmas. Keep up the fucking good work
13:05
Dear Carpette, please remember that Carps is a class A drug and habit forming. Before you know it you're robbing your old granny to fund your Carps addiction. God bless and a Happy Christmas
13:08
Happy christmas Winston and Manny!
13:42
Happy Christmas and a happy new year, Mr Stubbs. From all at the Phillip Hitech offices, we honour you deeply with ritualistic blood letting and a savoury snack selection.
12:53
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